Our Wedding; Saying I do (The second time)

Our Wedding; Saying I do (The second time)

It’s hard to believe that almost 6 year to the day I said “I do” to a woman, I said “I do” to the man of my dreams. Though both were weddings, they each represent a very different chapter in the story line of my life. My first wedding was a death of everything I could and wanted to be. The second was a re-birth of hope of finding an even greater self.

I remember very few things of my first wedding. It was all such a blur, and I think I would have preferred it that way. One of the main things I remember is when everyone was walking down the aisle toward me I cried and everyone thought it was because I was so in love and so excited to start this new life with a woman. But that couldn’t have been further from the truth. I remember staring at myself in the mirror of the Jehovah’s Witness Kingdom Hall bathroom, and saying, “Ok, so you’re really doing this?.....you are really going to try and live this lie and bury deep the man you so desperately want to be?”

A little while later we were all celebrating with our friends and families. I wondered was anyone thinking that I was gay at the time, or found it odd that ‘Jamie’ was marrying a woman. Perhaps he would just live a life alone instead of marrying a woman. That way he could still serve the God of their choice and not hurt anyone. Turns out that trying to ‘pray the gay away’ doesn’t really work – and thank-God for that! I have never been more proud to be who I am now that I am re-married.

August 24^th proved to be the best day of my life thus far. Had anything gone more perfect I would have thought it was a dream. I woke up snuggled into my niece and my two sisters, one of which was home from Winnipeg. It was raining outside at the time, however it didn’t dampen my spirits in the least. As the hair stylists piled into the room to get started on the girls hair and make-up, I had to run out to get a few last minute things done. And no wedding would be good without a “Tim’s” run. I wasn’t nervous. Or scared. Only 100% excited to marry my best friend. Most people don’t get a guarantee that their partner would stick with them through the worst of things, in fact finding that they leave during trial and tribulation. But Perry met me and took me under his wing when I was knocking at death’s door remember? He has seen me at my worst and as I said in my vows, has ‘brought me to my best’.

The time started moving really fast and before I knew it, it was time for me to hop in the tub and put my suit and tie on. I was amazed at how the timing of the day went just so. 11:30am we were due to be on the bus, and I’d be damned if 11:29am we weren’t pulling out of the Ramada parking lot. We were off to Fort Amherst to meet our amazing photographer Courtney Dinney, from Courtney Dinney Photography. Not sure if all photographers are willing to go where she went to make sure Perry and I got the best shots possible. The rain held off thank god for the first few hours of shots. We got some great ones. It was great to just have Perry and I and a camera to capture the love we have for each other. I have only seen a couple of teasers but I think Courtney nailed exactly what we were looking for. A couple of the girls complained a lot about the mist and cool air, but Perry quickly told them to knock it off as this was not an everyday thing! We had full suits on, and they had skimpy dresses so I can imagine it was a little cool, but they were troopers and made the best of it.

We did have the party bus rented that we enjoyed riding around on, drinking on, and dancing on. The bus driver proved to be quite the hunk too! So both Perry and I and all the girls got to enjoy that extra bonus!! J The party bus was the probably the best decision we made. We didn’t have to wait on anyone for pictures, we all just got off and then when the pictures were done, just jumped right back on the bus.

We stopped on the boat dock to get some ‘newfie’ inspired shots before heading under the overpass to get some high fashion shots that are worthy, (in my opinion) to put in bridal magazines. We continued to take pictures until heading to Signal Hill for a little drive and ending back to the hotel for 4pm. Supper was at 5pm so it gave us and the girls a chance to freshen up and catch our breath.

People wondered why Perry and I decided to change the line-up of your traditional wedding and go with something different. I HATE when people have their ceremony at like 1 or 2 in the afternoon and then if you are not invited to the supper, you are sitting around in your good dress clothes, just trying to pass the day away until around 7:30 when you are invited back for the reception. This way, we had people come to supper, and then stay for the ceremony at 7pm, where all 140 guests were invited to join us, and then hard the party right after. No one had to wait around, and instead of tying up everyone’s day; it was an evening event, not a whole day thing.

Supper was DELICIOUS!! We chose the menu. We had a creamy strawberry-mandarin spinach salad to start. Wine was served and supplied by my Auntie Heather and Uncle Len, which we were informed through a whisper as the waitress poured our glass – a very nice gift! The wine even tasted better! Then the main course! A herbed-nut and cheese stuffed chicken breast with dutches potato and grilled veggies! It was SOOOOO good!! And then carrot cake for dessert.

The speeches were what I will most likely treasure most from the day, second only to Perry’s vows to me which we exchanged a little later. One after another some of our girls brought tears to the entire group of family and friends, sharing their stories of love, laughter and joy. Deborah started the affair of telling of our school days and how we have been friends since the very beginning. I couldn’t imagined having a more perfect fit for maid of honor then this incredible woman! She looked so stunning that day and made me so happy to have her by my side. She even sang for us and played her guitar which was just the perfect gift for that day. ( I will never forget that D!) Next was Sam, Perry’s maid of honor who shared details about their life-long friendship. The most emotional speech was from my cousin Megz who basically gave a thank-you speech to Perry for saving my life on behalf of my family. It was the most heartfelt thing I had ever heard uttered from a human’s mouth and there was not a dry eye in the house. Thank-You Meghan!  

Once the speeches were finished from the rest of the girls, including Candice’s attempt at rapping, Perry and I thanked everyone who was involved with making our wedding the best day of our lives. There were so many incredible people who were involved with making our day such a success. I’m sure there were those we forgot, and I hope they know how appreciate they are.

There wasn’t a lot of time left before we all filled the ceremony room. It was beautifully lit with soft lighting and white linens covered all the chairs. There was such a crowd, some even standing outside! The music started and Perry’s brother Jamie was the first to enter the room. Then one after another, spaced by about 20 seconds, the remained of the girls walked down the aisle. I was the first to travel down with my beautiful mother on my arm and I kissed her cheek and sat her in her seat. And then as the music escalated into a climax of violin, Perry and his mom entered the room. He took my breath away, like it was the first time I had seen him that day. He truly was a vision in white! Looked just like the angel that walked into my hospital room in February of 2012. As he walked towards me, we held each other’s eyes. This time it was different. This time I wasn’t afraid at all. I was more than willing to give my heart to Perry knowing that not even death would separate the kind of love we have for each other.

As love was described in 1 Corinthians, I couldn’t help but reflect on how Jehovah’s Witnesses feel that if you are not one of them, you don’t have any respect for the bible or God for that matter. And here I was devoting myself to a man who loved me for who I am, and that the love that was described in those verses was more realized now then in my previous marriage because of truth…….no lies.

As we exchanged vows there were even more tears. Including Perry and I. I honestly felt that it was just the two of us in the room. Reflecting on that feeling send chills through my spine even now. “Before you I lived in a world where nothing made sense. The sky wasn’t blue and the grass wasn’t green’…..I said to him. And promised my heart to him until the end of days, and he did likewise. And then we shared the perfect kiss.

Shortly after we were introduced as Mr. and Mr. Perry Chaulk and walked, hand-in-hand, down the aisle to greet everyone with their warm wishes and congratulations.   

Then the party started! We danced our first song to Christina Perri’s “A Thousand Years”….the lyrics were just perfect for our story. It was magical dancing in Perry’s arms in front of our family and friends. Our bridal party song was “Raise your glass” by P!nk, and then “Mother like mine” by The Band Perry we waltzed with our moms to. Finally with our nieces and nephew, “I hope you dance” by Leanne Womack.

Then, the floor was free to everyone. We danced. Oh did we dance. And everyone had such beautiful smiles as we spent the first few hours as a married couple. It was so great to catch up with family and friends we hadn’t seen in so long!

It was an early night for everyone. We were all so tired but everyone had such a great time! The feedback we got from the wedding was that it was the ‘wedding of the year, if not the wedding of the decade’.

Thank-You to everyone who made our day so special and showed us so much love weather you were there or posted on Facebook! It made our day PERFECT! XO

It truly was……the perfect day!

I Love you Perry Chaulk!
xo

Peace and Love,
Jamie Chaulk
xo